Holiday Update – 12/27/23

It’s been a while for me to be able to sit down with all my thoughts. I thought that before the new year I should go back home and spend some time with family, but between you and me, it gets harder to come back home every time. I don’t want to give up, though. There’s a million different reasons, and I know that some of you can understand what I mean.

I just get trapped in my own head. It’s when I’m sitting in a room full of people and I can’t really hear any of them. Growing up, I had this same problem. I still get stuck in my head and overthink things in Chicago, but it’s over just trivial things since everything is still somewhat new to me in that city. In Detroit, it seems like every street corner is another memory I unlock.

Growing up, there was only one person in this world who knew exactly how I feel, what I think and why I make art. Around this time, I am reminded that we can no longer be together. I still try to keep his art alive. Every time I think about him I can’t help myself from getting emotional.

I was told that in this world, if you laugh then the world will laugh with you and if you cry, the world will laugh even harder. I know that I can be over the top and extremely expressive, and that throws people off because they want to have a good time and not think about anything heavy. I just can’t help it.

I am thankful I was raised the way I was raised. Hearing stories from my family of how they were raised makes me feel incredibly lucky. I know we all struggle on this planet to find purpose and a place. I know our time here is limited and the thought of losing anyone else genuinely frightens me and keeps me up at night. I just don’t want to be alone, and that is exactly why I make art.

These pictures were from a couple of Christmases ago. I wanted to share them, finally because they would just get lost in time. Whenever I want to spend time with my Uncle, I just scroll through his Facebook and read his story. It’s all there, archived through posts and YouTube Music links. I hope that I can archive my life through my music career.

I have to keep this music thing alive no matter what. There’s too much good going for it. I may not be hustling like I used to, but I still do come out with releases and do some shows here and there… It’s not as much as I’d like but I’ll take what I can get. I got bills to pay in America and I can’t miss out on the money. My family works so hard for what they have, and I want those same things; housing security, and financial independence.

I am blessed that art comes so naturally to me. I wish that people in my hometown would get it, maybe they do, It’s just rare to meet openly expressive creatives. That’s why I loved my uncle, he did not care who saw his art, it was impossible for him to hide it from the world.

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