Excited, Terrified, Happy and Sad – 05/10/24

Hi world, it’s me. I am excited, terrified, happy and sad. I am leaving one of my jobs by the end of this month. I guess I just realized that if I am going to have a creative career, I might as well start now. I feel like I could be making a mistake because I really needed the income, but I know that in my heart I can really make a creative career work out. I trust God on this one. All signs point to him, because I was freaking out and then I saw someone’s sweatshirt on the street that said “Romans 8:18” on it. Troubles reveal who you are.

I could do the job, I just had a hard time because it wasn’t me. I really have no role models for creative work in my family other than my uncle. I miss him, he was really cool. He was a photographer, bit I am unsure if he really did any freelancing with his skill. I just have to get my hustle on starting now!

I want to do sound for video games, ideally. Or composition, or freelance… Something where I can be creative. I was thinking about doing therapy or counseling, but I don’t know completely about that one. Imagine getting a therapist and Googling their name only to find out that they wrote a song called “SUICIDE ROOM”. I don’t know.

So I went to the music store where I used to take lessons and I asked the guys working there why they stay for so long at that store even though everyone hates it. They said that they get to spend all day with musicians in a music store. Simple as that. It is truly inspiring. I really considered what I wanted to do with my life in that moment.

What is really exciting is that we just announced a tour! HECK YEAH let’s talk about that.

This is my first opportunity to do something like this. Perhaps there will be another if all goes well. Maybe I can make this into my full time gig. Growing up, it was heavily discouraged. I think I am ready for this.

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